Sunday, December 30, 2007

The Cockroach


When I was on my mission in California, our apartment was so overrun with cockroaches that we just learned to live with them. We tried everything to kill them and they wouldn't go away. Every time we would turn on the light in the kitchen we would see a scattering of cockroaches to their respective hiding places. Some became pretty brash and would stay out knowing that we probably couldn't do anything about it. Well, I am having a similar problem with a different kind of cockroach. So, if any of you have had experience with the following, please let me know because I need some practical advice:

A guy I will call Mr. Cockroach keeps showing up in my life. We went on a few dates almost TWENTY years ago, and I can't seem to shake him loose. It only took a couple of dates for me to realize how totally not interested I was and that I would be moving on. I remained friends with him because 1) I was young and stupid and 2) we worked at the same place for a couple of years and I thought it would be mature of me if I didn't go around telling people what a weirdo Mr. Cockroach was. Looking back, I should have. Maybe it would've gotten rid of him. Probably not.


I have tried nicely requesting he stay out of my life. I have tried being extremely blunt, telling him I wanted absolutely nothing more to do with him. I have tried allowing my boyfriends and/or husband to talk to him and tell him to stay out of my life. Nevertheless, he keeps showing up!!! The last time he called, Bret told him we didn't want anymore communication from him -- ever. But, Mr. Cockroach doesn't seem to get it because he sent me a freakin' Christmas card!!! The guy is in Colombia working for the DEA. Does it tell you something about the type of people the DEA will hire? Is it too much or too awful to hope for some kind of kidnapping by the drug cartel down there? Even then, I think he would find a way to keep showing up! Damn cockroaches!!!

I hope none of you have had to deal with cockroaches because they are so extremely annoying, but if you have any advice you have would be great!

3 comments:

Kristin said...

I love the correlation here Lish because Cockroaches do seem to presesnt themselves in all the wrong places, at all the wrong times--My only experience with cockroaches involved throwing my shoes at them, stepping on them, screaming and hiding in my room hoping they would crawl away. But cockroaches just have no clue about observing boundaries or personal space (I remember the cockroach in Hawaii that crawled on my bed toward my face--talk about personal space). I say find yourself a good exterminator :)!

Jennie B. said...

Oh my gosh! If I were you, I would take it as a compliment! He just can't get away from the best thing that ever happened to him! And Bret? He should be proud he ended up with you. Ha! That's hilarious! However, I despise cockroaches.

Kim said...

As I have not had any previous experience with stalkers, I regretfully cannot offer any sound advice. (Forgive me for chuckling while reading your account!) If Brett can't scare him away, I don't know what will. I don't want you to move to some obscure country just to hide your identity! If it comes to that I will hunt him down personally, you know how overprotective I can be. GRRRRR! Just tell him you have 5 almost 6 kids. Maybe he will be scared of the commitment that would entail. (lol) You know I love ya!